I've changed a lot since high school. Everyone has. I'm a firm believer that college changes people. But not necessarily in a bad way. I am so much more independent and confident than the girl I was three years ago, which comes from living on my own, making my own decisions, and finding out who I am in the midst of 4,000 young adults.
Ironically, I've also always been one who hates change. I didn't want to move from my childhood home, I didn't want to no longer be the only child, I couldn't handle my high school boyfriend leaving for college... and he didn't even move out. Some might say I have some anxiety issues. I might be one of those people. But one thing that hasn't changed about my personality is my heart.
Alright so we all know I am a desperately hopeless romantic. My heart melts when couples hold hands, I don't let myself be content until everyone around me is happy, and I wear my heart on my sleeve.
I'm one of those ones who cares too much. Like I was the kid who cried when I made someone else cry on the playground because I felt so guilty for hurting their feelings, or whatever it was. I just get my feelings hurt too easily. Where does the title tie into this? Selfishness.
Sure, everyone can be selfish. I personally am usually selfish when it comes to my family. I tend to forget about the wants my brothers might have and sometimes throw my little tantrums when things don't go my way around the house. But with friends (please tell me if this is inaccurate so I don't look like a total ass hole) I really try to put others first. You know to keep the peace, keep my friends, and because I pretty much just go along with things to assure I'm not left out (honestly I'm not as big of a follower as that just sounded).
So that being said, I do appreciate being put first at least on people's radar of care. Sorry, no such luck. I've learned through many experiences in my college career that sometimes people really just don't give a shit about anything other than themselves. Sorry, that's harsh but seriously!
Maybe it's just our age group, maybe it's just the times (the media contributes a lot to everything this days), but I really struggle to surround myself with those with big, caring hearts, which is discouraging to say the least.
This being said, I have collection of wonderful friends who I know would do anything for me, who I love unconditionally and I know they do the same; so I don't want to step on anybody's toes. I just want to put it out there that I don't think I'm the only girl who is hurt by others' lack of respect. So maybe just think next time you're making a decision that might be affecting someone other than yourself, because it could really do some damage if you care to think about it.
No comments:
Post a Comment