I can hardly believe that in exactly one month, 30 days, I will be jet-setting across the Atlantic to my new home in Madrid, Spain. This doesn't seem real! Given everything that's been going on in my life with Joseph's accident, quitting my job, and finishing up my TEFL Certification I have barely had time to breathe, let alone try to get ready for this adventure. There are so many unknowns in my life right now, but what I do know is that I am officially (literally bought my ticket 10 minutes ago) going to Spain. By myself. For 10 months. Woof.
Three weeks ago my world got turned upside down. And while part of me feels selfish saying that because I know so many dear friends who have gone through excruciatingly traumatic experiences worse than ours, this is the first tragedy I have faced that I was old enough to understand and endure.
I was taking a week off work, enjoying my time fueling my faith at camp and meeting some pretty incredible people when I learned that we're all one phone call from our knees. Every day since then has been a stopwatch on steroids. Time just flies by. Five seconds ago I was confident that I would be here to help Joseph be back to school and on his way to normal just in time to leave for my trip. I had 6 weeks, still no visa, and plenty of time to pick a flight and still make the budget.
But then life happened. Again.
I can honestly say that everything that has happened in the past three weeks is something to which I could retort with, "That happens sometimes but it's not going to happen to us.." But it did. We thought we were going home.. infection. We had everything ready for tomorrow.. inpatient physical therapy.
And it's so so hard because as an adult, I can foresee that there IS an INCREDIBLE future ahead for this little boy. But as a 9-year-old, Joseph thinks he's dying. He's never felt this kind of pain. He's never gone 3 weeks without a bath. He's never been confined to 4 walls of a 12 foot by 12 foot room in a motorized bed fit with bedpan. It's so hard for me to see him so upset and discouraged and fearful of the future he doesn't even think he has.
So many people have shared awe-inspiring stories of incredible feats accomplished by people using prosthetic limbs. Things you or I could never even dream of doing. But how do you explain to a kid that these things are possible? I have this dark corner in my mind where I wonder, what if Joe becomes so depressed and so discouraged that he DOES let this debilitate his future, his potential? How do you keep pushing someone who: A) doesn't want to do what you're trying to make them do, and B) as Joseph would tell you, "just had their foot cut off by a lawn mower"
You literally cannot argue with that.
And then here I am, part of me trying to help, hanging out with Johnny, making trips to Riley, making sure the pets are alive. But then part of me is planning to spend 10 months, nearly a year, 4,000 miles away from my family, who is just entering the eye of this storm. So many things running through my thoughts, my dreams, my nightmares. I tell the same stories to the same people over and over again because I honestly can't even remember most of the thoughts I have when I have them. I'm trying to squeeze so much into this brief blip of time, and on top of that I can't help but feel a bit guilty for leaving.
If you know me, you know that I believe that everything happens for a reason. I think one of the positives to come from this accident is that I have had an opportunity I would have never had to grow closer to my brother, John. With the age difference and other differences here and there I know that we wouldn't have had this chance under "normal" circumstances. Now I also don't want you to misconstrue this to mean that I think what happened had to happen so I could deepen my relationships with my family. Because that's just not true. I simply mean that, as I've said before, the only way to move on and adapt to what's happened is to think of the positives.
So here are some more positives to leave you with:
1. I truly have the most supportive, caring family and friends ever. Thank you.
2. I have become an expert on making Johnny do things around the house so I don't have to.
3. I have successfully made Joseph laugh on numerous occasions in the past week.
4. I have the opportunity of a lifetime to embark on in 4 short weeks, and I'm confident that this is what God has planned for me to do.
Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers, cards and meals, and especially hugs. We need 'em now more than ever!
Thursday, August 14, 2014
Tuesday, July 29, 2014
The "new normal"
As many of you probably know, my family experienced a serious emergency last Thursday. I wanted to write this post to provide an explanation for anyone who wants to know what happened but didn't want to ask, but mostly for the hundreds of loving souls who have been praying for my family endlessly these past few days, so that they would know their prayers have been and are being answered.
While I was away volunteering as a counselor at Camp Adventure, my 9-year-old brother Joseph was in a lawn mower accident where his right foot was damaged beyond repair. After being air-lifted to Riley Hospital for Children in Indianapolis, he underwent a surgery where the majority of his right foot was removed.
I decided it was best for me to stay my final night at camp instead of returning home right away because honestly I don't think it would have been safe for me to drive for 4+ hours in the emotional state I was in. We'll come back to this part later...
On Saturday afternoon, a family who went through pretty much the exact same situation with their son, Jace, came to visit Joseph. Jace's accident had happened 2 years ago when he was 5-years-old, and he too had been treated at Riley.
I truly believe Jace and his parents are angels.
They explained what they had gone through, and just hearing them share our pain, shock, and fear helped to relieve these same feelings. Jace showed us his prosthetic leg, decorated with the Duck Commander logo, and showed us how fast he could run.. yes RUN.. around our room. We asked them question after question and they graciously answered us with honesty and compassion. I could physically feel stress being lifted off my shoulders when Jace told us that all the kids at school loved him just the same if not more with his "robo-leg". Even though there will be rough times ahead, they assured us that we are more scared than Joe is and that he will be back at it in no time.
Yesterday morning Joseph underwent surgery for a partial amputation, where the surgeon removed about the bottom third of his leg. We learned this was necessary because in order to fit a prosthetic, they need a certain amount of bone, and the size of the bones at his ankle just weren't enough to fit a prosthetic. Johnny was excited to get to spend the night at the hospital last night with his brother, and even though he feels terrible about Joe's leg, he knows the accident was not his fault.
At this point the doctors are working toward being able to manage Joseph's pain orally so we can take him home in the next few days! He has made improvements every hour of every day, today he was even walking in a walker. God has been present through this entire trauma, and he's not leaving any time soon. Johnny even said the other day, the profoundly wise 11-year-old that he is, that God knew this was going to happen before Joe was even born so He knows were going to get through this and that Joe will be O.K.
Isn't it troubling that sometimes it takes a tragedy to get us to believe in the power of prayer? You hear it all the time, please pray for... but how often do we truly, honestly stop and cry out for the pain or needs of others who ask for prayer?
I can't fathom the amount of prayer Joseph and my family have received these past few days-- but I have felt it.
The strength and calm I felt over the weekend was not my own, it was from my protector, and it was a result of prayer. When I fell to my knees on the phone with my mom Thursday afternoon, I was instantly covered in prayer by fellow counselors and directors at camp. The kindness and grace shown by these people that I hardly knew was unlike any love I've ever felt before. Unconditional. And it came from God.
My entire family received messages, calls, and just encouragement from people we hadn't heard from in years. The outpouring of support and love was and still is unbelievable, my only hope now is that it will continue. Life didn't stop when Joe's accident happened, but it did change. Now more than ever we need your prayers, love and support as we learn how to live our "new normal". A lot of things are going to be different, but Joseph is going to be the best he ever was when he's back on his feet. Positive attitudes are the only option for us at this point, and we won't accept defeat.
I am confident that Joseph is going to be able to do everything he ever could do and more, and to anyone who believes anything different...
Well, let's just say bless your heart.
While I was away volunteering as a counselor at Camp Adventure, my 9-year-old brother Joseph was in a lawn mower accident where his right foot was damaged beyond repair. After being air-lifted to Riley Hospital for Children in Indianapolis, he underwent a surgery where the majority of his right foot was removed.
I decided it was best for me to stay my final night at camp instead of returning home right away because honestly I don't think it would have been safe for me to drive for 4+ hours in the emotional state I was in. We'll come back to this part later...
On Saturday afternoon, a family who went through pretty much the exact same situation with their son, Jace, came to visit Joseph. Jace's accident had happened 2 years ago when he was 5-years-old, and he too had been treated at Riley.
I truly believe Jace and his parents are angels.
They explained what they had gone through, and just hearing them share our pain, shock, and fear helped to relieve these same feelings. Jace showed us his prosthetic leg, decorated with the Duck Commander logo, and showed us how fast he could run.. yes RUN.. around our room. We asked them question after question and they graciously answered us with honesty and compassion. I could physically feel stress being lifted off my shoulders when Jace told us that all the kids at school loved him just the same if not more with his "robo-leg". Even though there will be rough times ahead, they assured us that we are more scared than Joe is and that he will be back at it in no time.
Yesterday morning Joseph underwent surgery for a partial amputation, where the surgeon removed about the bottom third of his leg. We learned this was necessary because in order to fit a prosthetic, they need a certain amount of bone, and the size of the bones at his ankle just weren't enough to fit a prosthetic. Johnny was excited to get to spend the night at the hospital last night with his brother, and even though he feels terrible about Joe's leg, he knows the accident was not his fault.
At this point the doctors are working toward being able to manage Joseph's pain orally so we can take him home in the next few days! He has made improvements every hour of every day, today he was even walking in a walker. God has been present through this entire trauma, and he's not leaving any time soon. Johnny even said the other day, the profoundly wise 11-year-old that he is, that God knew this was going to happen before Joe was even born so He knows were going to get through this and that Joe will be O.K.
Isn't it troubling that sometimes it takes a tragedy to get us to believe in the power of prayer? You hear it all the time, please pray for... but how often do we truly, honestly stop and cry out for the pain or needs of others who ask for prayer?
I can't fathom the amount of prayer Joseph and my family have received these past few days-- but I have felt it.
The strength and calm I felt over the weekend was not my own, it was from my protector, and it was a result of prayer. When I fell to my knees on the phone with my mom Thursday afternoon, I was instantly covered in prayer by fellow counselors and directors at camp. The kindness and grace shown by these people that I hardly knew was unlike any love I've ever felt before. Unconditional. And it came from God.
My entire family received messages, calls, and just encouragement from people we hadn't heard from in years. The outpouring of support and love was and still is unbelievable, my only hope now is that it will continue. Life didn't stop when Joe's accident happened, but it did change. Now more than ever we need your prayers, love and support as we learn how to live our "new normal". A lot of things are going to be different, but Joseph is going to be the best he ever was when he's back on his feet. Positive attitudes are the only option for us at this point, and we won't accept defeat.
I am confident that Joseph is going to be able to do everything he ever could do and more, and to anyone who believes anything different...
Well, let's just say bless your heart.
Sunday, June 29, 2014
If you ever plan on eating at a restaurant again in your life...
What I'm here to say in this post is important, and needs to be learned by nearly every single person ever.
That is, unless they have ever been a waitress.
I have worked as a waitress for just over a year now in three different restaurants, and even though I don't have major experience, I have learned a thing or two about the restaurant industry. But maybe more importantly about the customer service industry, and how we the people are epically failing those who work to serve us. So whether you agree with what I'm saying or not, whether you've ever been a waitress, or ever worked in a customer service position, it's my hope that you will pass this message (or one like it) along to those in your life who you would hate to have their food spit in, not that that ever actually happens....
Ok so first let's think of the reasons why you go out to eat:
Whatever the case may be, you make the choice to go out to eat wherever you want for a reason, right?
Now, you get there and there's a wait.. well that shouldn't really come as a surprise because this is the best restaurant in town. I mean, why else would YOU come here to eat? The food is delicious, the atmosphere is enjoyable, it shouldn't come as a shock that other people think so too!
But here is where the dining experience often takes a plummeting pitfall. You don't want to wait. You shouldn't have to wait. You're hungry. You've got other things to do. How much longer is this going to take.
You FINALLY get seated and your server seems a bit flustered. The place is packed and they're setting up the band for the live music show. All you want is a soda, beer, salad. Where is my waitress?!
Let's hop outside your brain for a minute and consider the other people involved here. First, the kitchen staff. Those guys are working their tails off, in a likely sweltering kitchen, with hot, sharp equipment and orders coming in like crazy. They have been at it for 6 hours now, the dinner rush just coming on. Move outside the kitchen and there are the serving staff. Pacing quickly to table after table, smiling, filling drinks, taking orders, answering to every beck and call. Doing the best job they can given the kitchen back-up and hindered mobility around the restaurant due to the large crowd.
Okay back into your brain, it makes sense that you would be slightly antsy when you finally get seated and naturally you're thinking that your waiter has been waiting for you just as long as you've been waiting for them. Ah, but patience grasshopper. You're not the first table they've served tonight, and you won't be the last. They have to provide excellent service to tens maybe hundreds of customers tonight. So how do you think you would feel when in the middle of all this running around and people pleasing and trying to keep orders and salads and drinks straight, a customer begins to complain about how slow things seem to be moving?
Hold on because this right here is the important point I was talking about earlier! It is NOT, I repeat NOT your waitress's fault that the restaurant is full. Not her fault that there are only so many pop machines in the place to fill your glasses. Not her fault that she isn't allowed behind the bar to pour your beer. So do us all a favor and CALM THE HECK DOWN. Yes, I do understand that some people just aren't cut out to be waitresses and they might elicit negative feedback and treatment, however this is usually not the case.
Check yourself people. There are so many things going on behind the scenes of a busy restaurant that have absolutely nothing to do with you, your waitress, or the service you personally are receiving. So calm down, please. Be patient. Be nice. Treat your waitress how you want them to treat you. They are after all responsible for your food and if they can tell from the beginning that your sour-puss attitude is probably not going to tip them well, they're going to immediately write you off and focus on the tables that have adequate social skills. They're not going to waste precious time on a no-money table.
What I'm saying may not be the case for a super high scale, fancy shmancy, fine dining establishment.. but if you're reading my blog I doubt you eat at those anyway. All I'm saying is if you take anything at all away from this message, be nice to restaurant staff when you go out to eat. Your food's messed up? Your waitress is not the one who cooked it. You had to wait 45 minutes for a table in the corner? Well there was a reason you came to the place, looks like other people had the same idea tonight. And last but not least...
That is, unless they have ever been a waitress.
I have worked as a waitress for just over a year now in three different restaurants, and even though I don't have major experience, I have learned a thing or two about the restaurant industry. But maybe more importantly about the customer service industry, and how we the people are epically failing those who work to serve us. So whether you agree with what I'm saying or not, whether you've ever been a waitress, or ever worked in a customer service position, it's my hope that you will pass this message (or one like it) along to those in your life who you would hate to have their food spit in, not that that ever actually happens....
Ok so first let's think of the reasons why you go out to eat:
It's the weekend, you want to let loose and have some fun!
You're out to celebrate.
You just love the food and atmosphere of your favorite restaurant.
Family get togethers.
Random date night.
Now, you get there and there's a wait.. well that shouldn't really come as a surprise because this is the best restaurant in town. I mean, why else would YOU come here to eat? The food is delicious, the atmosphere is enjoyable, it shouldn't come as a shock that other people think so too!
But here is where the dining experience often takes a plummeting pitfall. You don't want to wait. You shouldn't have to wait. You're hungry. You've got other things to do. How much longer is this going to take.
You FINALLY get seated and your server seems a bit flustered. The place is packed and they're setting up the band for the live music show. All you want is a soda, beer, salad. Where is my waitress?!
Let's hop outside your brain for a minute and consider the other people involved here. First, the kitchen staff. Those guys are working their tails off, in a likely sweltering kitchen, with hot, sharp equipment and orders coming in like crazy. They have been at it for 6 hours now, the dinner rush just coming on. Move outside the kitchen and there are the serving staff. Pacing quickly to table after table, smiling, filling drinks, taking orders, answering to every beck and call. Doing the best job they can given the kitchen back-up and hindered mobility around the restaurant due to the large crowd.
Okay back into your brain, it makes sense that you would be slightly antsy when you finally get seated and naturally you're thinking that your waiter has been waiting for you just as long as you've been waiting for them. Ah, but patience grasshopper. You're not the first table they've served tonight, and you won't be the last. They have to provide excellent service to tens maybe hundreds of customers tonight. So how do you think you would feel when in the middle of all this running around and people pleasing and trying to keep orders and salads and drinks straight, a customer begins to complain about how slow things seem to be moving?
Hold on because this right here is the important point I was talking about earlier! It is NOT, I repeat NOT your waitress's fault that the restaurant is full. Not her fault that there are only so many pop machines in the place to fill your glasses. Not her fault that she isn't allowed behind the bar to pour your beer. So do us all a favor and CALM THE HECK DOWN. Yes, I do understand that some people just aren't cut out to be waitresses and they might elicit negative feedback and treatment, however this is usually not the case.
Check yourself people. There are so many things going on behind the scenes of a busy restaurant that have absolutely nothing to do with you, your waitress, or the service you personally are receiving. So calm down, please. Be patient. Be nice. Treat your waitress how you want them to treat you. They are after all responsible for your food and if they can tell from the beginning that your sour-puss attitude is probably not going to tip them well, they're going to immediately write you off and focus on the tables that have adequate social skills. They're not going to waste precious time on a no-money table.
What I'm saying may not be the case for a super high scale, fancy shmancy, fine dining establishment.. but if you're reading my blog I doubt you eat at those anyway. All I'm saying is if you take anything at all away from this message, be nice to restaurant staff when you go out to eat. Your food's messed up? Your waitress is not the one who cooked it. You had to wait 45 minutes for a table in the corner? Well there was a reason you came to the place, looks like other people had the same idea tonight. And last but not least...
TIP 20% Y'ALL!
If that's too much you're cheap then at least double the tax as your tip (about 14%). But never ever ever in the history of the 21st century has it been appropriate to tip 10% or less. That's just rude. And keep in mind that all of the waitresses are going to remember the one's who don't tip. And they're gonna tell all their little waitress friends too.
Friday, March 14, 2014
Pet Peeves
Tonight at work I was faced with some unfortunately sub-par customers, and it really got me thinking about little thinks that grind my gears. Everyone has pet peeves, I didn't realize I had so many... Some of this list are stretching it, but I had to make it an even 10 (see peeve #1).
What are your pet peeves? Do we share any ticks? Hopefully if nothing else you'll get a giggle out of mine... I'll warn you, writing out all your least favorite things gets the heart rate going, so make sure you're prepared to unleash them all at one time... here goes:
What are your pet peeves? Do we share any ticks? Hopefully if nothing else you'll get a giggle out of mine... I'll warn you, writing out all your least favorite things gets the heart rate going, so make sure you're prepared to unleash them all at one time... here goes:
My Top 10 Pet Peeves:
1. when people leave a ridiculously random change tip so their bill can be even. I'm not your mom, I'm not impressed by your elementary math skills. do me a favor and round up.
2. with that being said, bad tippers in general. if you're leaving less than 15% tips (and you received what you would consider average service) I have this newsflash for you... IT'S 2014! Tipping 10% or less is just rude, and it's SO frustrating.
3. bikers in the middle of the road. it's spring, the bikers are out with their spandex suits and their flashy helmets and they literally take up the entire road. unnecessary. I can't pass you because what if you tip over and then I hit you? I can't stay behind you because I can't make my car go without my foot on the gas.
4. when people don't understand "reply" vs. "reply all" when responding to an email. not as much of an issue since I'm not in student organizations or classes anymore.. but still annoying.
5. threading bobbins. I just hate it. can't figure it out.
6. kathie lee & hoda. just stop. it is never appropriate to drink like that in the morning unless it's homecoming, or you're tailgating. neither of which are kathie lee & hoda doing.
7. talking on the phone in a group of people and expecting me to be quiet. dude, are you seriously answering the phone right now? don't shush me. don't ask me to turn the tv down. leave! go somewhere else! you're the one who decided to answer the phone!
8. when twist off beer caps don't twist off and I skin my fingers trying to open them. that is false advertising and all I wanted was to enjoy an adult beverage while keeping all 10 fingers in tact. is that too much to ask?
9. all those wedding shows where the bride is picking out her wedding dress and has an outrageous budget of like 8 grand. honey, if you have $8,000 to blow on a dress you're literally going to wear one time and then probably trash for one of those "rock the frock" wedding photo shoots, I've got $22,000 in debt you can help pay off that'll go to a more worthy cause.
10. when people tell me my hair is so adorable but they could never go short. why does it have to be that big of a deal? do you think before anyone chops 12 inches off their hair they're thinking "like omg my hair is going to look super feminine and gorgeous when it's half an inch long!" also I'm not 13, I'm not going for "adorable" anymore.
TGIF y'all!! Have a splendid weekend filled with your favorite things! Peace 'n blessings :)
Tuesday, February 4, 2014
Life without religion?
I'm very familiar now with the commute from my rental home in Indianapolis to my home church in Plainfield. It takes about 30 minutes depending on traffic, and I try to bring friends along whenever I can so I'm not belting show tunes by myself.
On this route there is a particular billboard that stands out to me, right before I get on the highway. It's a picture of a woman's face, and next to it are the words:
Maybe you've seen one like it?
Sponsored by the Center for Inquiry, the billboard is advertising secularism for people who don't have present beliefs or haven't committed to a belief system.
This billboard at first made me angry. The way it ironically bore it's smiling face at me each time I headed to my place of worship. I just wanted to yell at the lady on the poster and be like, "Yeah well millions of people are living happily WITH religion too, lady!"
However, now when I pass the propaganda, it makes me giggle because what they are advertising, while it's not "religion", is a place or a group or a system of beliefs for people who don't have one, or who don't want to be "religious."
But isn't that part of the definition of religion? I mean take out the god or gods you believe in and the rituals and traditions and what have you, and a religion, a church is a group of people who share a set of beliefs who come together for support and for company and for peace of mind.
On this route there is a particular billboard that stands out to me, right before I get on the highway. It's a picture of a woman's face, and next to it are the words:
"Millions of people are living happily without religion."
Maybe you've seen one like it?
Sponsored by the Center for Inquiry, the billboard is advertising secularism for people who don't have present beliefs or haven't committed to a belief system.
(I had to look up the definition of secularism.. )
This billboard at first made me angry. The way it ironically bore it's smiling face at me each time I headed to my place of worship. I just wanted to yell at the lady on the poster and be like, "Yeah well millions of people are living happily WITH religion too, lady!"
And living eternally I might add!
However, now when I pass the propaganda, it makes me giggle because what they are advertising, while it's not "religion", is a place or a group or a system of beliefs for people who don't have one, or who don't want to be "religious."
But isn't that part of the definition of religion? I mean take out the god or gods you believe in and the rituals and traditions and what have you, and a religion, a church is a group of people who share a set of beliefs who come together for support and for company and for peace of mind.
So, are they advertising:
"living happily without religion"
or
"living happily because we don't have to call ourselves religious even though for all intents and purposes we essentially are"
The last thing I want to do is debate secularism vs. christianity or any other religion, but if you think about it this seems like a case of the pot calling the kettle black, doesn't it?
Monday, December 30, 2013
New Year's Revolution
Good evening blogosphere! And a grand welcome back to.. myself.. as I seemed to have taken a semester long hiatus from doing any writing! In case you didn't know, I finished my undergrad just a few short weeks ago and am anxiously awaiting the arrival of my diploma in the mail!
Wooooo so let's get down to business!
So I'm currently snuggled under the electric heat blanket in a guest bedroom of my grandparents house in sunny warm sub-zero Minnesota. One of my favorite places to visit growing up, I still get giddy when I get to grandma and grandpa's big, familiar house. As I've grown up I've been truly blessed to have all of my grandparents (that's 9 to be exact..) around and *relatively close by.
*relatively as in within 10 hours driving distance....
Now though, it's a different kind of fun being with my grandparents because now I actually have to opportunity to get to know them as individual people, and not just fun visitors who usually have presents or cookies for me. Now, I am interested in talking to them about things I know, learning from and teaching them the ways of our worlds. Thismorning afternoon (literally 12:15) once I made it out of bed, the discussion was New Year's resolutions... or as I drowsily named them "revolutions." We all got a good laugh as I welcomed a cup of coffee and the conversation was dissolved with my brain fart as we retreated to the sun room.
As I lazily hung out today I kept coming back to this "revolution" idea.. and I gotta say, I think I kind of like it! I mean usually our resolutions are to lose 15 pounds, exercise daily, stop drinking pop, stop drinking period... but it's always kind of got a negative connotation. Like, "oh I need to start out the new year by punishing myself for the way I ended the last." But instead today I got to thinking, "I'm going to revolutionize 2014 by implementing something to really radically change the way I live this year."
A mixture of my verbal slip and an article I found at Relevantmagazine.com (an awesome! online magazine for today's believers) called 13 Lessons I learned in 2013 started off with the idea of choosing "One Word" with the idea that instead of coming up with a list of unrealistic goals as a resolution that won't last 5 minutes, to choose one word that you will use to shape everything you do in the coming year. I'll let you go out and read the article so I don't have to paraphrase it here, it's a really great one!!!
Even though I had already decided on a resolution, I'm going to try to become a vegetarian..., I am going to do this "One Word" thing too. I've got my list down to two words I'm choosing from, and maybe there's a way for me to whittle them down into one.
My first choice is enough. This is kind of a broad option, but it's also straight to the point. I want to recognize how much is enough. Just to use enough for me and not be gluttonous or excessive in my thoughts and actions. Try to live as simply as possible and be thankful that all I have is enough.
My second choice is intentional. This is something I sometimes struggle with. To be intentional in every single thing I do. To make realistic goals and intentionally try to achieve them. To leave no to-do's uncrossed, but to also put a few on my list that will take hard work to accomplish. To have and to know the reason behind everything I do, every decision I make.
What do you think? Is a 2014 going to be revolutionary for you?
Happy New Year!
Wooooo so let's get down to business!
So I'm currently snuggled under the electric heat blanket in a guest bedroom of my grandparents house in s
*relatively as in within 10 hours driving distance....
Now though, it's a different kind of fun being with my grandparents because now I actually have to opportunity to get to know them as individual people, and not just fun visitors who usually have presents or cookies for me. Now, I am interested in talking to them about things I know, learning from and teaching them the ways of our worlds. This
As I lazily hung out today I kept coming back to this "revolution" idea.. and I gotta say, I think I kind of like it! I mean usually our resolutions are to lose 15 pounds, exercise daily, stop drinking pop, stop drinking period... but it's always kind of got a negative connotation. Like, "oh I need to start out the new year by punishing myself for the way I ended the last." But instead today I got to thinking, "I'm going to revolutionize 2014 by implementing something to really radically change the way I live this year."
A mixture of my verbal slip and an article I found at Relevantmagazine.com (an awesome! online magazine for today's believers) called 13 Lessons I learned in 2013 started off with the idea of choosing "One Word" with the idea that instead of coming up with a list of unrealistic goals as a resolution that won't last 5 minutes, to choose one word that you will use to shape everything you do in the coming year. I'll let you go out and read the article so I don't have to paraphrase it here, it's a really great one!!!
Even though I had already decided on a resolution, I'm going to try to become a vegetarian..., I am going to do this "One Word" thing too. I've got my list down to two words I'm choosing from, and maybe there's a way for me to whittle them down into one.
My first choice is enough. This is kind of a broad option, but it's also straight to the point. I want to recognize how much is enough. Just to use enough for me and not be gluttonous or excessive in my thoughts and actions. Try to live as simply as possible and be thankful that all I have is enough.
My second choice is intentional. This is something I sometimes struggle with. To be intentional in every single thing I do. To make realistic goals and intentionally try to achieve them. To leave no to-do's uncrossed, but to also put a few on my list that will take hard work to accomplish. To have and to know the reason behind everything I do, every decision I make.
What do you think? Is a 2014 going to be revolutionary for you?
Happy New Year!
Wednesday, November 6, 2013
Who really knows?
I feel a big vent coming on. Actually it's already started.
From a few big disappointments that have hit me the past few weeks I just feel like I keep getting hit while I'm down. Like that can't catch a break, drowning, screaming with no voice feeling. Can I get an Amen?
Well, tonight after a truly inspiring viewing of the documentary Half the Sky (only a 40-minute version as the entire program is about 4 hours long) and consecutive discussion with a representative from the Circle of Sisterhood organization it was time for our weekly house bible study. This week however was the once-per-month "Odyssey" meeting, which is for members of all Greek houses on campus to get in the word together in one place. When it's Odyssey week we try to go as a group.. anyway the speaker tonight was talking about making decisions.
Now, I will preface this post by saying that I did take away some very interesting and useful information about making a mission statement for my life and prioritizing my values and what not. However, I have about had it up to my double chin with people condescending my Christianity... and I'm not even talking about non-believers! This guy started off his talk and naturally had to throw in drinking and sex right off the bat.
Okay, I'm sorry but drinking and sex are not the only 2 things that happen in college and quite honestly I think sitting in a fraternity basement filled with 19-21 year olds and telling them that you can't hang out with your boyfriend with the door closed is gonna do more harm for them than good. And even though he did share some really insightful stuff about faith-based decision making I think his presentation would have been 100 times better if he had left the sex talk out of it.
I'm not just saying this because it made me feel bad, and I don't like to be reminded of past mistakes or pain or whatever, I'm saying this because I know many of those students probably felt somewhat victimized by the topic of the conversation, when it was supposedly supposed to be about using faith in your long-term life decisions with where you wanted to go in life.
There are a million different ways to live a life for Christ. I believe that giving your heart, and committing your life to Him is the first step for any Christian, but there is no such thing as a "good" or "bad" Christian. I believe that it is important to know your convictions, and to align them with scripture and to follow your conscience, but I also believe that this looks different for every person. For instance, I'll use the door-closed example.
(Please note that I do not have any sort of boyfriend.. so no, Mom, I'm not trying to justify why I want to watch Bridesmaids with the door closed)
Essentially the example the speaker gave was that why is it necessary to hang out with your boy/girlfriend with the door closed? If nothing "evil" was going on in there then why is it such a big deal to leave it open? Because if you close it, what is the guy across the hall going to think is going on in there? And weren't you just sharing your faith with him? Do your actions match your words?
The whole time he was saying this I felt myself regressing to my teenage years, where yes I did have a boyfriend, and I can see where this is a relevant point to be made to my former self; but you know I don't understand where he got off telling a group of again 20 somethings this in a FRATERNITY BASEMENT. Dude, I know first hand the kind of crap that goes on down there, like who does he think he's talking to?
Doesn't the fact that 100 Greek students came out at 10:00 on a weeknight maybe show that we are in some way, shape, or form devoted to our faith and/or beliefs? And we are adults now, or getting there, we (or at least I) have a pretty good grasp on who I am, on my convictions and Jimminy Cricket pitched a tent in my heart a long time ago. I think that if someone is a Christian, and has a boyfriend or whatever, and wants to hang out with them then let them! They have their convictions, they know what the Bible says, and if someone is assuming they're doing something they're not quite frankly, who cares!? In the end if that's not the truth that person just wasted their night judging someone's level of Christianity by the fact that they had someone in their room with the door closed.
I really, truly am not trying to step on anyone's toes by sharing this, but you know I just believe that faith is really perceived in different ways for lots of people, and God is the only one who knows who's right or wrong. He's the only one who knows EXACTLY every single word, phrase, metaphor in the Bible means. And do you really think that if He sees in someone's heart that they have committed themselves to Him, and know in their heart and mind what their relationship is with Christ, that He gives a flying rat that they had a beer while watching a football game or wanted to watch a movie with the door closed?
I just don't think so. And I know that I could be wrong, that I don't know how God thinks or what He thinks. It really just hurts my heart that people try to say that they do.
From a few big disappointments that have hit me the past few weeks I just feel like I keep getting hit while I'm down. Like that can't catch a break, drowning, screaming with no voice feeling. Can I get an Amen?
Well, tonight after a truly inspiring viewing of the documentary Half the Sky (only a 40-minute version as the entire program is about 4 hours long) and consecutive discussion with a representative from the Circle of Sisterhood organization it was time for our weekly house bible study. This week however was the once-per-month "Odyssey" meeting, which is for members of all Greek houses on campus to get in the word together in one place. When it's Odyssey week we try to go as a group.. anyway the speaker tonight was talking about making decisions.
Now, I will preface this post by saying that I did take away some very interesting and useful information about making a mission statement for my life and prioritizing my values and what not. However, I have about had it up to my double chin with people condescending my Christianity... and I'm not even talking about non-believers! This guy started off his talk and naturally had to throw in drinking and sex right off the bat.
Okay, I'm sorry but drinking and sex are not the only 2 things that happen in college and quite honestly I think sitting in a fraternity basement filled with 19-21 year olds and telling them that you can't hang out with your boyfriend with the door closed is gonna do more harm for them than good. And even though he did share some really insightful stuff about faith-based decision making I think his presentation would have been 100 times better if he had left the sex talk out of it.
I'm not just saying this because it made me feel bad, and I don't like to be reminded of past mistakes or pain or whatever, I'm saying this because I know many of those students probably felt somewhat victimized by the topic of the conversation, when it was supposedly supposed to be about using faith in your long-term life decisions with where you wanted to go in life.
There are a million different ways to live a life for Christ. I believe that giving your heart, and committing your life to Him is the first step for any Christian, but there is no such thing as a "good" or "bad" Christian. I believe that it is important to know your convictions, and to align them with scripture and to follow your conscience, but I also believe that this looks different for every person. For instance, I'll use the door-closed example.
(Please note that I do not have any sort of boyfriend.. so no, Mom, I'm not trying to justify why I want to watch Bridesmaids with the door closed)
Essentially the example the speaker gave was that why is it necessary to hang out with your boy/girlfriend with the door closed? If nothing "evil" was going on in there then why is it such a big deal to leave it open? Because if you close it, what is the guy across the hall going to think is going on in there? And weren't you just sharing your faith with him? Do your actions match your words?
The whole time he was saying this I felt myself regressing to my teenage years, where yes I did have a boyfriend, and I can see where this is a relevant point to be made to my former self; but you know I don't understand where he got off telling a group of again 20 somethings this in a FRATERNITY BASEMENT. Dude, I know first hand the kind of crap that goes on down there, like who does he think he's talking to?
Doesn't the fact that 100 Greek students came out at 10:00 on a weeknight maybe show that we are in some way, shape, or form devoted to our faith and/or beliefs? And we are adults now, or getting there, we (or at least I) have a pretty good grasp on who I am, on my convictions and Jimminy Cricket pitched a tent in my heart a long time ago. I think that if someone is a Christian, and has a boyfriend or whatever, and wants to hang out with them then let them! They have their convictions, they know what the Bible says, and if someone is assuming they're doing something they're not quite frankly, who cares!? In the end if that's not the truth that person just wasted their night judging someone's level of Christianity by the fact that they had someone in their room with the door closed.
I really, truly am not trying to step on anyone's toes by sharing this, but you know I just believe that faith is really perceived in different ways for lots of people, and God is the only one who knows who's right or wrong. He's the only one who knows EXACTLY every single word, phrase, metaphor in the Bible means. And do you really think that if He sees in someone's heart that they have committed themselves to Him, and know in their heart and mind what their relationship is with Christ, that He gives a flying rat that they had a beer while watching a football game or wanted to watch a movie with the door closed?
I just don't think so. And I know that I could be wrong, that I don't know how God thinks or what He thinks. It really just hurts my heart that people try to say that they do.
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